Welcome to Being a Woman in the Workplace

Unless you have been living under a rock over the last week, you have heard Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s (D-NY) response from the floor of the House to Rep. Ted Yoho’s (R-FL) comments to her on the steps of the Capitol. Just to recap, our hero was simply heading into work when she was accosted by Mr. Yoho, who, in front of reporters, referred to her as “disgusting” for nothing other than her comments linking crime to poverty and unemployment, for which she was not wrong. But, I digress. Once she had turned her back to escape the verbal abuse that was being leveled at her, Mr. Yoho proceeded to call her a “fucking bitch.” For refusing to stand there and absorb his vitriol. I can’t make this stuff up, friends. Upon hearing the story, what did the working women of the world do? Heaved a sigh, rolled our eyes, and muttered, “Here we fucking go again with this shit.”

After receiving some much deserved backlash, Representative Yoho took to the floor to issue the most ridiculous non-apology you ever did hear. At no point did he even mention Ms. Ocasio-Cortez’s name or even own the fact that he spoke those words to and about her. He used phrases such as, “attributed to me by the press” and “if they were construed that way, I apologize.” What the fuck does that even mean? How can you misconstrue “fucking bitch?” Words matter and this guy knows it. He was not prepared to actually apologize because he still can’t recognize what it was that he did wrong. In fact, I would dare to wager a guess that he would not have faux-apologized at all had he not been overheard by witnesses. In his world run by the patriarchy, he was simply defending his domain, one in which a woman deigned to invade. And a minority woman at that. Did these comments bother Ocasio-Cortez? Not particularly. After a lifetime of speaking her mind and being a woman in general, she is used to being called names by men every time she inadvertently makes them feel inferior. She was neither surprised nor particularly upset by Mr. Yoho’s verbal attacks. Being the youngest woman ever elected to the House, she was fair game as soon as she entered that virtual boys’ club. And that, right there, is the problem.

From the time we are in grammar school, girls learn how to tip toe around both boys’ territories and their feelings. Got a better grade on that test than the guy who called you “stupid” yesterday? Better not let him know it, it will anger him further. Want to punch the guy who keeps snapping your bra strap right in his ugly nose? I wouldn’t. He’ll just call you a “bitch” and you will be the one sitting in the principal’s office, not him. The dude who interrupts you mid-sentence in every single meeting? You’re probably better off not saying anything. You will only be deemed the office shrew, whereas your male counterpart will be called a real go-getter. We are forever weighing the pros and cons of speaking our minds and standing up for ourselves and, unfortunately, the cons can quite often outshine the pros. We don’t want to get detention. We don’t want to put our jobs in jeopardy. But, this woman who was elected by her constituents to one of the highest offices in the land, almost decided that it wasn’t worth it to her to say anything. But, after Mr. Yoho’s sad attempt at an apology, she hit her breaking point, and she. Let. Him. Have. It.

I won’t quote the speech she gave, it’s easily Googled and already all over the internet. I don’t need to talk about how many media outlets only saw her language on the floor of the House shocking because of where she was speaking them and not because her co-worker used them to describe her in the first place. Or have called her crazy. We are so used to that shit, that word literally doesn’t bother a single female that I know anymore. Oops, I guess I talked about it. Will Ms. Ocasio-Cortez be called a bitch again? Of course she will. She knows it, I know it, and you know it. Was her speech historic? Maybe. It would have nice, though, if she never had to give it in the first place.